Vanessa's Baptism

 I cannot believe that Vanessa is already 8 years old!!  Time flies.  October 8, 2011 is the day that Vanessa Marie Hall chose to be baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints!  I'm so proud and happy for her!  She was very nervous and excited at the same time.  The morning of the baptism, she was brushing "baptism bear's" fur.  

As I was watching her, I couldn't help but reflect on how much of a blessing her and Keagan are to our family!  I thought back to 10 years ago when my parents decided they wanted to adopt a baby.  We were so excited as a family but had no idea what a roller coaster ride the adoption process was.  I won't go into all the details, but it's not a quick and easy process.  I had decided to serve a mission around the same time, and I wanted nothing more than to have a baby in our home before I left, knowing that I wouldn't get to see my family for 18 months.  The Lord had a different time line in mind.  

 I left on my mission June 25, 2003 and Vanessa was born August 21, 2003,  my birthday.  I knew that this special connection was the Lord's way to help me feel connected to her since I wouldn't be around for the first 16 months of her life.  My family was diligent to send me pictures every month, so I could see her grow up.  I still have every single picture tucked away in my scripture case.  I was sad I couldn't be there for all the celebration along the way, but I always took comfort in my assumption that my family would wait for me to get Vanessa sealed to us.  I never clarified this; I just assumed.  March 6, 2004 rolled around and my family went to the Manti temple to have Vanessa sealed to us...I was still on my mission.  The heartbreak was back.  I loved being a missionary, but I wanted so badly to be with my family during these special times.  January 15, 2005 rolled around.  I remember sitting on an airplane from Cleveland to Salt Lake City and not quit sure how to feel.  The last 18 months of my life felt like a dream.  Like it never really happened.  I was sad to leave, nervous about what was ahead, and excited to see my family. 
I couldn't help but wonder, "Would Vanessa know who I am?  Would she cry when I tried to hold her?  What's it going to be like to see my family again?  She's almost 1 1/2 years old.  How big is she going to be?"  The anticipation made the flight longer.  We landed.  I was in no rush to get off the plane.  I sat in my seat and gladly let everyone else go ahead of me.  Finally, I got off and walked down the airport corridors.  I stepped onto the escalators leading to the airport waiting area and saw my family:  My dad and Karen, my mom, Shantell, Danielle, my friends Abby and T'liese, and a  previous mission companion Annie.

Vanessa's CTR cookie

There was Vanessa with her minnie mouse pom pom hair.  She reached her arms out immediately and came to me.  I remember holding her for the first time and thinking, "This must be what Heaven will feel like."  I was back with my family. 

   Vanessa finished combing "baptism bear's" fur and it was time to head to the church.  All our family started rolling in, less than 5 minutes before it started, as usual.   Dad would have the opportunity to baptize his 4th child.  Keagan still has 3 more years. 

David, Diane, and Grandma Ferre

Another girl in our ward named Emily would share the date with Vanessa.  Emily's grandfather gave the talk on baptism before she would be baptized by her father.  Vanessa was next.  She walked into the water nervously and got a quick reminder from Dad on how to hold her hands.  Dad lowered her into the water, and sure enough, Vanessa's foot pops up. Try again.  Second time was a success.  Not everyone is lucky enough to be baptized twice!!  

Dean, Ann, Amanda, Jaxon, Max

  The prelude music played while everyone changed into dry clothes.  I sat in my seat trying to calm my nerves.  It was exactly 1 week ago that I received a phone call from Karen,  "Vanessa wants you to speak at her baptism."  I immediately replied, "Yes, of course.  I would love to."  I felt honored at the opportunity to share my thoughts and testimony with my little sister on her special day. 

Debbie and Kim, aunt and uncle

The music stopped, and Bishop Jones turned the time over to me.  It was a beautiful sight to stand up there and see 2 little girls sitting in their little white dresses.  I shared a text conversation that Vanessa had with Danielle earlier that day on my phone.  Danielle was not able to come up from New Mexico for this day, but she made sure to share with Vanessa via text on how important this is.  I also shared an analogy about the door handle being on our side of the door and it's our responsibility to turned the handle to open the door and let the Holy Ghost into our lives.  Most importantly, I shared my testimony on how proud Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ is of her.  The confirmations followed.  The program came to an end.  After making everyone pose for pictures, everyone headed back to the house for food.                 

Vanessa practicing the piano

 I may not have been there for the celebration of bringing Vanessa home as a baby, or for her first tears, first steps, first words, first time walking, but I was there for her baptism.  I spoke at it.  I will be there for every other big event of her life, of my family's life, because they are the closest thing to Heaven I have.

My family!  Danielle, Nate, Owen, Dakota, and Austin were there in Spirit