Our friend had a genius idea to go on a hiking/bbq adventure. You know it's going to be a great night when you start out getting bad directions and are led astray from the beginning. We learned there is a difference between the UTA station on 3900 S near I-215 and the Trax station on 3900 S near I-15. But alas, we eventually made it to the picnic/hike area, but not before someone left the hotdog buns and napkins in the car down at the bottom of the canyon. Said person still claims that she was yet again led astray by thinking that the bbq was AFTER the hike and NOT in the canyon. Side note: same person got lost that left stuff in car! And that person is not me! Dinner entertainment proved unique. A debate began about whether the proper terminology is "wreaking havoc," "reaping havoc," or "wrecking havoc." No conclusion was ever formed. Then we played 2 truths and a lie. To spice it up, mine were, "I have freckles, I have brown hair, and these are fake." An oblivious Zoobie responded, "What? Your eyelashes." After stuffing our faces, we decided to go on the hike. Within 5 minutes, the real hikers were separated from the rest of us. We started out happy enough!
The couples made sure to get the traditional "let's pretend we're taking post marriage engagement" pictures. I did not have anyone to take a picture with....this concept would come into play later in the night when I asked, "who's going to check me for ticks?"
And this is when the whole night went sour. The majority of the group was much farther up the trail than us, so Aaron introduced a short cut. It looked like a simple and easy way to cut the corners on a switchback, thus catching us up with the rest of the group. This was very far from the truth. This trail would later become known as the "son of an aaron" trail!
The couples still found ways to try to keep the torturous hike romantic. Nuzzling on someone's neck when we're not sure if we will live past tonight is not my idea of a romantic evening!
As the sun was going down and we had been off the real trail for 1 hour or so, my spirits were starting to damper. I kept asking Aaron how much farther til the real trail was found. I would sit on the ground and say, "Aaron, I'm not moving til you find the real trail." He would venture off for 5 minutes and then yell to us that he found it! We would hike to where he was and see a couple deer tracks.....not a trail!!! In his good natured way, he would laugh and encourage us to keep coming. "Trails are boring!", he would say! After another 30 minutes of hiking, while the shrubbery and trees were scraping my whole body all along the way, my spirits were getting lower and lower. Good thing Landon and Hailee were pushing up the rear. Occasionally, I would feel Hailee give my little tush and push from behind. I later learned that these were usually the times when Landon was giving her a little push from behind. The pushes started light hearted by all involved, but after more time passed and it kept getting darker, my attitude was changing. In an effort to cheer me up, my friends kept saying the all too familiar phrase, "we'll laugh about this later!" I would respond, "no, I will not!" and i genuinely meant it! Deep inside, the fear was looming that I truly would not live past tonight! The sun was going down and we were nowhere near a trail! Hailee kept reminding us to watch out for mountain bears. Still hiking. Still no trail. Tears were beginning to surface! At one point, I stopped in my tracks and tried to gather my strength and determination to keep going. Hailee said to Landon, who in her terms is "a starer" to "not look honey" and diverted his attention by pointing to a neighboring peak, "I can't believe there's still snow." I later found out that Hailee was thinking, "this is the most uncomfortable I've ever felt around Holly." I found it fitting to sit down again and send Aaron off to find the trail. He left us there and 5 minutes later yelled, "I found it." Although I appreciate his boyish charm, I did not find humor in his lying. I replied, "Aaron, you know I love you, but if you didn't find the real trail, I am going to kick you in the balls." Aaron, "What?" I yelled louder. Aaron, "What?" Everyone else chimes in and yells "she's going to kick you in the balls!" Much to my surprise, Aaron finally led us to a the trail! We never made it to the top, but we made it to the trail. Period. That was accomplishment enough for me.
As the sun was going down and we had been off the real trail for 1 hour or so, my spirits were starting to damper. I kept asking Aaron how much farther til the real trail was found. I would sit on the ground and say, "Aaron, I'm not moving til you find the real trail." He would venture off for 5 minutes and then yell to us that he found it! We would hike to where he was and see a couple deer tracks.....not a trail!!! In his good natured way, he would laugh and encourage us to keep coming. "Trails are boring!", he would say! After another 30 minutes of hiking, while the shrubbery and trees were scraping my whole body all along the way, my spirits were getting lower and lower. Good thing Landon and Hailee were pushing up the rear. Occasionally, I would feel Hailee give my little tush and push from behind. I later learned that these were usually the times when Landon was giving her a little push from behind. The pushes started light hearted by all involved, but after more time passed and it kept getting darker, my attitude was changing. In an effort to cheer me up, my friends kept saying the all too familiar phrase, "we'll laugh about this later!" I would respond, "no, I will not!" and i genuinely meant it! Deep inside, the fear was looming that I truly would not live past tonight! The sun was going down and we were nowhere near a trail! Hailee kept reminding us to watch out for mountain bears. Still hiking. Still no trail. Tears were beginning to surface! At one point, I stopped in my tracks and tried to gather my strength and determination to keep going. Hailee said to Landon, who in her terms is "a starer" to "not look honey" and diverted his attention by pointing to a neighboring peak, "I can't believe there's still snow." I later found out that Hailee was thinking, "this is the most uncomfortable I've ever felt around Holly." I found it fitting to sit down again and send Aaron off to find the trail. He left us there and 5 minutes later yelled, "I found it." Although I appreciate his boyish charm, I did not find humor in his lying. I replied, "Aaron, you know I love you, but if you didn't find the real trail, I am going to kick you in the balls." Aaron, "What?" I yelled louder. Aaron, "What?" Everyone else chimes in and yells "she's going to kick you in the balls!" Much to my surprise, Aaron finally led us to a the trail! We never made it to the top, but we made it to the trail. Period. That was accomplishment enough for me. 
It was officially dark at this point, we started down the trail with a sense of appreciation for life itself! Aaron found humor in telling cowboy poetry and occasionally hiding behind a tree to jump out and scare me! Lucky for him, my humor was slowly coming back. Halfway down the trail, Landon says, "anyone care for a pickle?" We all turn around, confusion filling the air. Where on earth did he get a pickle? Turns out he had them in his back pack the whole time and got a sudden craving! Those pickles could have been the death of us about 1 hour earlier. We all know that mountain bears are drawn to hidden food amidst campers. Or they could have been our life savers if we would have had to spend the night. We could have rationed them between the 5 of us! After enjoying our pickle, we continued to hike. My allergies were acting up the whole night, so at one point I was sneezing a lot and trying to clear my sinuses. Unintentionally, I "hocked" my first loogi. Half astonished, half disgusted, I raised my arms and shouted, "my first loogi!!" Hailee immediately assumed she just stepped in it. To which I assured her she did not! It was not my most glamorous night, but at this point, the damage had been done!
We made it the bottom of the trail, after I only fell once coming down the mountain in the pitch dark, and waited for the rest of the group to finish. We had to pee but those out houses were disgusting and smelly! Our hike was near some sort of reception place in Millcreek canyon, and this night appeared to have one. There were cars everywhere! I decided to go squat near a truck tire and relieve my bladder. Once my business was completed, I started walking back to the crowd. Squish! I had stepped in poop...not my own! Ew! That's gross! I think karma was paying me back for using nature as a toilet. The rest of our party had eventually made it down the mountain. We proceeded to relay our adventures to them, and yes, even laughed, despite my conviction that I "would not laugh about this later." Our hearts softened, and when all was said and done, we decided to not make "kristen" (our friend who planned the hike) a swear word. However, "son of an aaron" WILL remain a swear word.....FOREVER!!
We made it the bottom of the trail, after I only fell once coming down the mountain in the pitch dark, and waited for the rest of the group to finish. We had to pee but those out houses were disgusting and smelly! Our hike was near some sort of reception place in Millcreek canyon, and this night appeared to have one. There were cars everywhere! I decided to go squat near a truck tire and relieve my bladder. Once my business was completed, I started walking back to the crowd. Squish! I had stepped in poop...not my own! Ew! That's gross! I think karma was paying me back for using nature as a toilet. The rest of our party had eventually made it down the mountain. We proceeded to relay our adventures to them, and yes, even laughed, despite my conviction that I "would not laugh about this later." Our hearts softened, and when all was said and done, we decided to not make "kristen" (our friend who planned the hike) a swear word. However, "son of an aaron" WILL remain a swear word.....FOREVER!!
2 comments:
Ok! You did an awesome job writing this. Aaron and I read it as our bedtime story last night haha It was very entertaining.
Once again, this is the exact reason you avoid nature at all costs, I mean c'mon what can beat airconditioning and indoor plumbing really?
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